Sunday, December 30, 2007

Would I lie to you?

Once apon a time there was a game people would play called two truths and one lie. I think we all know the details. I think the purpose was to help people get to know you better. Anyways, here are 3 things you didn't know about me, two are true and one is a lie.

1. I made out with Dustin Diamond (aka Screech from Saved by the bell) on a Ski trip in Colorado. We had met on the ski lift and ended up having hotel rooms on the same floor. Anyways, one thing led to another...

2. I had a breast reduction when I was 18. My boobs were so enormous that I could not play volleyball effectively even with the 3 extra strength sports bras, that I special ordered

3. When I was born I had a growth that was rather large on my lower back. At 6 months they had it removed, they actually did some tests and there was teeth, an under developed spine and hair in the growth. I guess I had a twin. We named him Adam, because that was going to be my name if I was a boy.

JK Smiles.... whenever i played the game I would always just tell 3 lies. I guess I am always ultra honest in my life, that when it is game time, I just gotta do some trick lies. I hope you enjoyed my creativity. Yes, I know I am probably the biggest fan of my jokes. Make up a really good trick lie... that I would believe.

Getting to Know You and taking home the crap you didn't want in your house anymore

White Elephant Madness. We (about 7 couples, Jamie and I) had the best time ever... It was seriously one of those nights when everyone has a good time, you laugh so hard your belly aches the next day. People say things they shouldn't but it is OK. Things that you were once overly sensitive about, get brought up and turned into something quite laughable. The thing is, I liked most of the people back then (although we definitely had our moments and our jealously issues, single, Mormon, women tend to experience that) but now I think the world of them (and their husbands)... I guess we bonded over white elephant and the hypothetical question get to know you game. I got to know that if "you had to write a song about your true love what would it be titled?" 'Your my second choice' -mitch. I got to know, "if you were going to get a tattoo on your body, when and where would it be?" 'Tramp Stamp, Lucky 13' -Lindsey. I got to know "what is your best feature" 'privates' -anonymous. All in all funny.

The white elephant gave these little gems. That is Jamie rocking the leather wonder.

Jill enjoying the best of the worst, Mormon, full-length features, of all time

Thursday, December 27, 2007

Rawsome attempt 89 in full effect.... care to join me?

I got the chubs going. Too many peppermint Joes. Too many tamales, enchiladas, peanut brittle, M and M's, pulled pork on a baked potato, hummus with filafil, brownies, ice cream, hot chocolate with Irish cream, Peanut butter cookies with Hershey's Kisses on top, chicken wings, sugar cookies with frosting, Pete's fish and chips (i rocked that at about 3 today), Pei Wei honey seared shrimp... Adios my friends

Hello to spinach, carrot, celery, broccoli and flax seed shake. Hello to 18 tangerines at a time, Hello to depression land. Goodbye to chubbers... you see here in AZ we start laying out in February. That means I gotta get down to business. It also means I will start being more bitter I assume, when I got no goodnessess to carry me through the sadness of life is overwhelming... at any rate, Here I go again.

I invite anyone who wishes to venture into a world of fruit and veggie magic, a cornacopia of raw flavors, of clearer skin, of a body that functions on a healthier level to join my rawsome quest. Just turn off the stove and save your new micro wave for another day (maybe Sunday or in a few months, who knows how long this will last).

"Many men have loved me, but not for 6 months in a row".

Here is the deal. Painting. Condo. by myself. No cable.

DI. Saturday. Movies for VHS. 1$ each. 80's classics/90's goodness. Reality Bites, 1st Wives Club. Say Anything. 16 Candles.

16 Candles. 3 and a half times. consecutively. Condo painted. 2 and a half walls. That's a lot of Candles and paint.

I love it. The movie and my born again condo.

Long Duck Dong. Jake Ryan. Farmer Ted. will be in my dreams tonight... goodnight.

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Things that annoy me. Today's list.

1. A girl in my ward has her myspace profile picture with her in a "pink taco scottsdale" tank top on. It seriously grosses me out, why do you need to wear that? Why...(obviously i won't ask her, well i just might, maybe during church)

2. These lazy contractors aka a**holes keep dumping mattresses and sectionals next to our communal dumpster. Seriously there were 8 mattresses there and 2 sectionals out there. Who does that? They don't even live here. Can't I live in the ghetto in peace. It is disgusting that instead of paying the dump the few dollars, they go to our little slice of ghetto heaven and crap all over it. GRRRR.

3. That paint costs so much. I am painting the condo, by myself and the whole process just is a pain. I got all this primer in my hair. A flash forward glimpse to my hair when the grays arrive. I am tired, I have a head ache because of the fumes. Then I justed remembered that Families Forever movie, the church makes as a missionary tool. I used to watch it when I was baby sitting and got scared so I turned on a church movie to feel better. Anyways, this black couple is having problems with their marriage, I mean they used to be best friends, and now life just gets in the's like they don't even communicate anymore. Then the missionaries find them, and then this song plays, and then they are doing nice things together, like painting their condo together. Later on my mission we used this movie as a tool, I probably watched it 100x or so, in Spanish of course. So whenever I paint, I think of that black couple and get all annoyed... I want someone to paint with me, and I can cross out the word "study" that he wrote and in its place "nursery" to surprise my man (OK this means more if you have seen the "Together Forever" movie and remember the black couple).

4. Today on Linkup a very attractive Gilbert boy sent me a nice message. When i pulled up his picture I was disappointed. Not because he was ugly (that would have been disappointing too I suppose.) but because he was hot. How did I know. One of the three pictures had him with his shirt off. And man alive did his body look fantastic. Yet, It takes a certain kind of man, to disrobe for the linksters... I really don't think I am the woman for that certain kind of man (just a hunch) . Maybe I should send him to the "pink taco scottsdale" ward friend... Just a hunch.

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

All i want for Christmas...

1. A road bike, i gots to train, so I can make all my ironman dreams come true.

2. A micro-wave. I gotta use the stove for everything. I know all the marrieds have extras. If you got an extra in your garage or something. I will buy it for cheap, or except it as a gift of good will.

3. A wheat grass juicer and wheat grass trays. I do not know if 2008 holds rawsome success. But I do know it holds a lot of attempts.

4. A t-mobile cell phone. I dropped mine in water 3 weeks after extending my contract to 2 years. Hence, I can't get a new phone for free. To everyone out there who has a t-mobile phone, that still holds a charge (AK's lasts 9 hours max), that they are not using and letting their kids just knaw on, I am up for deals.

5. Maybe for the boy to call. But I am not calling him....operation classy lady is in full effect.

6. New Makeups, I am all about beautifying my 30 year old shell.

7. To hit the jackpot at Midnight Bingo. Let's face it, I am going to the res, and I am going to use my dauber the way it was meant to be used. I want to Blackout at the Early Bird Special (you should know what that means if you've been where we've been).

8. Tamales!!! I eat at least 3 a day, and the supply is wearing thin. (definitely need to gear up for those rawseome attempts)

9. Stocking Stuffers that mean something.

Goodnight and I will be dreaming of Christmas' past, present and future.

Monday, December 24, 2007

Looking for Love in all the Wrong Places.

Can i just say one more time, 2007 BLAR and the best year of my life all rolled into one fine little package. Now, onto the real reason you are here, i am about to say something mildly interesting.... READY SET BLOG!!!

I always wondered about those woman who have been engaged 6 times. Seriously that is too many. Most of the women I know, have only been engaged once. Guess what, they marry the dude. Today at all the holiday festivities I came across a recurring theme. Now I don't know if it is just my mind or the woman's mind, or all human minds... we like to find sincronocity (sorry Kurt, my home teacher says my blogging is great, but i can't spell, i tried to spell it right in like 6 ways, sorry). The theme of the day, was engagements. To expound, engagements getting broken off, but not 100 percent and the girl keeping the ring, while she thinks about it. What????

I am serious. I suppose that is a legit place to be. You say "Yes, I'm in", you enjoy being engaged, and then something comes up. Maybe you wonder if your man is in the 99 percent with an addiction to porn. Maybe the statistic of 50 percent divorce rate makes you think again. Maybe your ex boyfriend, who married your second cousin, after she left her first husband for no good reason, just got divorced, because she is now leaving your ex boyfriend/her 2nd husband for no good reason, and all of a sudden he is a possibility... and is looking better than the man whose ring is weighing down your finger. Hmmm.

I am not sure what sorts of dramas aka second thoughts ensue during an engagement. Yet, I always just thought one would be all in, or all out. Sort of like the HOKEY POKEY. I don't mean to trivialize all this. Figuring out your heart/life crap is a full-time venture, so here is my input...

You only get to marry once, or twice or whatever suits your fancy (hell as long as you are attractive and say what the person wants to hear, your got it made). So go on, take the plunge (loose the doubts, ignore the red flags, and quiet that little voice telling you to get the hell out)... you always get one or two starter marriages anyway, so if it doesn't work out, you can always get on linkup and start again. Merry Christmas.

*This BLOG is dedicated to my best friend Mitchell. Yes I do listen when you rant, and I am beginning to agree with your insights (on this subject at least)...

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

The light is back....

I have to say that 2007 was the hardest year of my life (and it is not over). And not just for any one reason. Surely, I am not the only one who is feeling like that. Hell, 2006 was rough too. I guess they all are. This year was harder on me though. For a while, I felt hopeless, used up, forgotten and overall just BLAR. Yet, I am happy to say, after a lot of hard work, great conversations, and love, the light is back in my eyes. Hopefully, it will stay. This is an official thank you, to all my friends and family who make my world beautiful and amazing. Maybe it is the Christmas spirit, maybe it is reflecting on how the world looked to me 6 months ago... but I feel blessed and happy. May the holidays bring love, peace and great insights to all (you know i love to give my insights).

Merry Christmas

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

I love rainbows, reading, divine nature and individual worth....

I love boas. I used to rock them on Halloween when I was playing the role of "80's Punk Princess". Coming across a whole lot of them after one Halloween on the clearance rack, was the best find ever. I gifted those to many Mesa brides at the ever exciting Bridal Shower.

If only Life was this simple... wait it is. This button was actually on the backpack you will encounter below. I found it at a thrift store of course, and instantly loved the message.

Because I love project runway, and I used to draw outfits on model thin woman in my preteen years, I love the idea of sewing (notice i said idea). I truly believed I would be the greatest fashion designer in the history of fashion. A few years later, I was rocking my dad's old cowboy flannels, jeans frayed at the bottom and Doc Martains. Threads remind me of what could have been, if the Seattle grunge wave hadn't hit Mesa AZ...That and Home Ec. at KJH. Go Kolts.

This backpack was not only sported all over Toro Town (aka Mtn. View HS) It was also my Young Woman Laurel Project...each color represents one of the values. Seriously... I got my medallions thanks to this sweet little number.

Monday, December 17, 2007

The night i did the Marcareana with the Mexicans and I held my own

Rita is the only pregnant one I promise

Nothing Hotter than spinning in my crochet outfit

The boys: Sumo, Dad and Jimbo talking about insurance

Dustin and his girl... and my brother Luke third wheelin it

It has been awhile since I got out the turn tables and rocked it. Thanks to Oasis Insurance (my dad's insurance agency) for hiring me for their Christmas Party. Basically there was a worry because they have never had a work party without alcohol, and the question was, "can people have a good time without beverages (aka Mormon Style)"? The answer is YES, as long as DJ Jodeci is there spinning tracks and getting the party started....aqui es mi testimonio de algo bien especial en mi vida. Bueno y Bueno. Soy muchisimo musical en muchas maneras. Mi Vida es musica y bailando, para siempre. En otros palabras, yo se que bailando es muy importante para todos. Amen.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

I love Willy. And all my mens....

My little bro. is coming home from Brazil in less than two months. His name is Willy.

I got a flat tire, today during church we spotted it (don't ask why we were not inside the building). Mitch fixed it and I am grateful.

My home teacher Kurt (see previous posts) and I are both sick. We shared an hour and fifteen minute visit today, of low octave conversation. Our visits just keep getting better. The best part was later, sitting next to each other at church. He brought the Halls soothing throat drops... I love him for the scriptures he shares and the medice he provides.

Sumo is nice.

James and his girlfriend just broke up. Which means I get my friend back. Whatever happens, happens. But for now I look forward to going to Subway where your Tranny friend works, for deals on Subs.

Skinny as can be, yet compensates when he grows a full beard. Kenny I am sorry I ruined your church game, by saying... "I can't make out tonight cause I got the sniffles". She didn't look too impressed.

Van you are 16 and you will get asked to winter formal if those classy ladies at Toro Town know what's good for them.

J. F. you will get the girl to leave her boyfriend if you keep playing "platonic racket ball sports"... good luck on that.

LUKE... you loved the Spanish version of Achy Breaky Heart. That's it I will get that for you for the holidays. Maybe.

2008 Boyfriends? I am waiting for you, and all the joy and pain we will cause each other. See you soon.

Saturday, December 15, 2007

I am legend.

I loved it, I love it, I loved it and you will too. See this as soon as you can. By far the best movie of the year. You will see, and you think about progress, and genetic modification differently, and it will rock your brain. When I saw it I was on a first date, I don't think he was ready to see a scary movie with me, I had to prepare him. I said, "I hope you don't get embarrassed, I laugh,
I scream, I jump and I get into the movie, you will see". He said, he was cool with it. He got a show, it was the scariest, intense movie ever....Enjoy and be glad you don't have to watch it with me. But go now... do not wait. It is just too good.

Cheek bones?

When I was in the beehives (the church age group class of 12-14 year olds) we went to the mall for makeovers at Royal Norman's or something. I think we got free lip gloss samples, that I horded for months. I would only use them for special occasions (for the life of me, i cannot recall what special occasions I was rocking at 12). Yet my advisor, Sister Echols (she had a home business of spin art with puffy paint on a t-shirt, you know with the wheel and all, where you put the glittery paint on the shirt and then spin it, I tell this just for context) gave me a complement I have not been able to shake, she said, "Jodi you have high cheek bones". I was 12, she was a weird puffy paint spin art Mom, but I still believe I have great cheekbones.

Jared was one of the two boys I wrote on my mission. If I ever missed the boat it is not choosing to be with him. He has given me the compliment of my life, "when you walk in the room, the whole thing lights up, no one else can do that, just you". To me that was beautiful.

I love to talk, and I am really good at it. But, I have been accused of making myself seem better than I am. Accused of telling too many secrets, mine and yours. Accused of being too idealistic in my conversations, views of others and ways of the world. My words have caused the greatest criticism.

I threw a party when I was in high school. I was a senior and it was a street party. I was wearing these short, short overalls. I also was wearing a purple flower cotton shirt underneath. I remember this in great detail, because that night. A punk Jr. or sophomore, who I had never seen before, was doing something he shouldn't and I think I told him to move his car or something, and he said, "whatever, you're fat". I had never been called fat before.... as you can tell I remember.

I know we gather our conceptions of ourselves from many sources. I am so glad that I am more than a fat girl, with great cheekbones, who can't keep her mouth shut, who can light up a room. But I cannot deny that the words, the compliments, the love letters, the tearing down words, and the chastisement of others play a huge role in my self image. I love that moms can instill in their daughters how beautiful and unique they are. My mom, was the best at this. I grew up with 8 girls on our block. That caused a lot of drama. Mom would always say, "they are boring, you are fun, creative, and lively" if I ever came home in tears. Yet, moms can't be there like before.

I applaud all you parents, couples, teachers and others who are out there building the emotional resevoir of your people. We are all in this together. Now maybe kind words and sincere compliments can't make a person (it takes other sources) yet I believe negative, manipulative, hurtful words can break one, especially if that resevoir isn't full. Who knows maybe that girl with the beautiful smile, or generous heart doesn't know it until you tell her. And maybe that's what she needs to know.

Friday, December 14, 2007

This is why I'm hot.....

I think I am a little sick because i am such a wuss that I leave the space heater on (longer than anyone should) and I put it so the hot air so it blows in my face. Isn't there an old wives tale about getting sick because breathing in hot air. That or one of the kiddo's gave me a new disease. Yuck.

I hate Christmas gift buying for 3 main reasons. First I am a cheap ace. Second I am anti materialism in all forms (except in some forms). Third, I hate shopping for reals (except at last chance aka Nordstroms returns paradise).

I am trying to be new Jodi, and be all mature and mysterious....Yet, I still throw little fits inside my head when things don't go my way (99 percent of the time things don't go my way). I think maturity means hiding the fit, and that hidden anger makes one more mysterious. Still working on this one. Don't get me wrong I am tranquillo too.

I guess these three things don't necessarily make me hot. But I know one thing that would for sure, wearing a t shirt that said, "this is why I'm hot", the boys would come a runnin for that goodness. When i see a second grader rocking that, I think "either your mom is brain dead" or "your mom is funny". I've seen 4 girls rocking that shirt in the last week. For some reason it annoys me. It's that end of the sememster BLARness.

Oh the water skiier pic was in the archives, it's not me. When i did my one month of lds planeting(a year ago) at first i had a fake sporty profile.... he he he. I guess having a fake sporty profile isn't really making me hotter either. So I suppose this blog could better be named, "This is why i am not hot (man i am glad there are only a few things that make me not hot).

Wednesday, December 12, 2007


I find it interesting how natural consequences work in my life. I guess i was taught that at a young age on the Goodman farm, well homestead if you will. You plant a seed and water it, and something grows, also you step in something mushy and don't wipe it off and go into the house, Momma Goodman get's pissed, or you use the word piss then Momma Goodman says' "don't say that or I will wash your mouth out with soap".

My condo has been a source of pain in my life. The renters who had it awhile ago caused all sorts of drama... first J_ _ _ had her boyfriend A _ _ _ move in with her. Now to each their own, the problem was that there were two other girls living in the condo. Who the neighbor just informed me were alcoholics, who would giggle and awaken the neighbors with sayings like, "i am going to piss upon this door if you don't open it" and I suppose J + A would come and open it?. I just knew the recently revealed alcoholics as "the sister slobs who left a turkey carcas along with 5 unsealed trash cans crawling with bugs, and a layer of rotten food upon the counter tops and floor 2 weeks after Thanksgiving". The problem was I found all these girls at the institute. So I felt there was an expectation of normalcy. I guess I thought the natural consequence of institute roomates was no lame drama. WRONG!!!

Oh yeah I was called over as one of the sister slobs was in a heated battle with A _ _ _ over the temp. One had installed a plastic box ( it was A _ _ _) and Sister Slob Jr. had a knife to break open the tempeture gage. I was called to act as mediator, aka Baby Sitter. This was all happening in the 30 day notice period I gave to the "love birds".

Now I guess the action that I took which was followed by these natural consequences was not screening the girls better. Heck i was desperate, and being that i have lived with over 50 girls (mission comps, roomates, my sister and Mom) I didn't think anyone could bring the lameness that these girls did. Blar. I guess i should have realized it when J _ _ _ wanted to move in and said she had a pet rat. Yeah I only see the best in people, i keep missing those blazing red flags...

Point is renting/land lording is a bitch... can't I just find the 50 acres and build the dream solar/love powered farm house. Without the lameness of the modern day roomate drama. Probably but I am sure there are natural consequences to that, that will reveal their tricky selves. I can take it.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Reality Star?

So there is something I need to come clean about... I have always resented Julie the Mormon on Real World. I wanted to be the first Mormon on Real World. Ever since the first season when it was in New York. Plus Julie wasn't cool, well I guess that is open for interpretation, but I would have been much cooler and more interesting to watch. Maybe... I suppose we will never know.

Now people think they are reality stars in their own right... My favorite is the person who updates their status on facebook every hour or so. Now I am sure they have an agenda or an "audience" who needs to know that their nap went well. But is a public forem really the spot.

Now to my vice... the blog. I love it. I love that someone in China found it, and read it for 3 min and 37 seconds (thanks Stat Meter). I love that I get a comment or two. I love that my stories and reflections and even diets are out there for whoever googles the words born again and barbie, or any other combination that leads them my way.

So yeah Julie you suck and I could have done better at making Seattle convert, but sometimes on a lucky day, some mystery person in Kentucky reads my blog for 4 and a half minutes, and that is important too.

Monday, December 10, 2007

My myspace is free....and all things Random.

1. I have been keeping my myspace private for quite sometime now. Actually it has been private for 2 and a half years. Yet due to some recent changes in my life, I and my myspace are free.... it feels so good to let loose and let the world endulge in the secrets of my myspace. Enjoy out there, my profile song is the best of all time, if you love technoish, European goodness.

2. Ever since i dropped my 5 week old phone in a glass of water in my car, I have been using AK's old ghetto 2002 cell phone (nothing but love Amy and thank you). Yesterday at church, after RS I got my phone out( yes i give mid church texters the stink eye...but if I had a dude to text i might mid-meeting it) to check my messages, my visit teacher (the one who asked if they were going to allow me to stay in the singles ward even though i am 30) said, "oh your phone is sooo cute, is it new... what??? Redemption for her, I was feeling all self conscious about the phone.

3. Pearce family white elephant party... Loved it, ate too much, bonded with all my first cousins once removed, ate gummy pizza, gummy hot-dogs and gummy hamburgers. Held babies, smelt stinky diapers, left the room when changing of the diapers insued, stayed away from the salad with the wet cheese (you know the white, wet cheese that shows it's ugly self and makes us glad we don't live in France). I love the White Elephant... I won Rook Cards (grandma Goodman would be proud, she taught me how to play when I was eight and am a card shark)

4. Thought about what to name this next year. You see once we named the summer, "summer of love 2000", and there was no love. So if I name this year, "Cold-fish 2008" maybe all my hot and heavy dreams will come true, i gotta do reverse psychology with the Universe.

5. Tonight, my Uncle is in the Elliot Groves Ward Bishopric (we whisper that name, you see Elliot groves is the 34-45 Singles Ward) said loudly at the family party, "I bet this is the year, Jodi gets' married"... I said, "I wouldn't bet on it, Grandma Van Epps said, "me neither... Than everyone gave their opinions. That's Funny.

6. Brought my juicer over from my parents, Hello carrot/tangerine juice and hello slightly orange skin....

7. Went to the Ward Party on Saturday Night. Actually rounded up a date too. Yep. We had the best time ever. The ward danced.... miracles do happen, and I was so proud of so many people for coming out. I feel very strongly that we need to support all the activities we can. The more people who participate, the more fun is had.

8. There is serious rain here in AZ... I love it. My cousin owns a ski rental shop and that means more snow and more business. I have dreams of Kayak greatness and more rain and snow means more river flows. Also it is just fun. I do miss the sunshine.

9. Thank you to all the friends out there, tonight especially to Tyler and Amelia. They are in town from Indiana. I am so proud of them and there little family. I love it when my favorite people end up with my next favorite people. You all have serious good taste in significant others.

10. Sumo (my only brother in law) is in the pic above. I am grateful that he loves my little sister so much. Also, loose some weight and win the weight loss challenge.. I saw him eating cauliflower chowder tonight? Is that Atkins?

Sunday, December 9, 2007

Maybe this is why I have never felt at home in az... My accent is all Michigan!

What American accent do you have?
Your Result: The Inland North

You may think you speak "Standard English straight out of the dictionary" but when you step away from the Great Lakes you get asked annoying questions like "Are you from Wisconsin?" or "Are you from Chicago?" Chances are you call carbonated drinks "pop."

The Northeast
The Midland
The South
The West
North Central
What American accent do you have?
Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

I love how they say you use the word "pop"... I call my beverages that. This quiz is soooo true.

Friday, December 7, 2007


My Linkup Pics and my agenda with each one:

Pic 1- I call this all American girl. P.S. i need a man to protect me from myself or I am an independent woman living my dreams, I fear nothing, and we can go adventures together (you see i let men see what they want to see in this pic)

Pic 2- I love animals... which means, I am a kind, tender, nurturing, nature loving woman.

Pic 3- There is a hidden depth of emotion just waiting for one lucky man to discover and I am quiet (not really though, lol)

Tonight Jen and I had girls night out. Actually because she dates so much, I rarely get to see her. But tonight was an exception. We were going to go out to cousin Sterling's birthday bash but since we didn't get the memo in time, we went to Pei Wei. As we were standing there, ordering our food, i got a big embrace from behind... the touch felt familiar, it was Hanz. Jen said, "i thought about calling you, but we didn't. Are you here on a date"? (she must've noticed the blond woman looming behind us) Hanz said, "yep we met on the linksters". Actually we are going to my house to watch Kung Fu, and we only met on linksters 20 minutes ago. If anyone doesn't know what Linksters is, and i promise tonight was the first time i heard the term (but will probably be using it multiple times a day), it means LDS linkup. Now LDS linkup isn't a paying site, and the preface is keeping in touch with friends. But every now and again, someone will tell me, "your a babe", say "sweetie You can pick the temple" or use phrases like, "i'm in love with the broken handed teacher"

As much as I am flattered by the cop in Texas, the Nursing student in Scottsdale and the Immigration specialist in Tucson typing out sweet nothings and small talk all filtered through the site, I am a little apprehensive. Not that true love or at least something worthwhile for now, couldn't be found on the site. Obviously the temples are full of people who made it, who met on linksters. Yet, I realize the chances of that are pretty slim. You see the people who are saying, "hey, I'm in love with the broken handed teacher"... are probably saying similar crap to everyone. I guess i just have a hard time believing anyone on these Mormon friendship/dating sites can be legit. Heck I don't even know if i am legit half the time. As you can see even my picture choice is fueled by an agenda (not really they were just the most flattering, is there any other agenda, really?)

But, aside from all the cynicism, i do know that sometimes after a lame night of social blarness, i come home to check if Billy Bob has sent me a little nuget of goodness. And once in awhile... Billy Bob delivers.

A header...

I put a picture up of my self as a header, but it just looked too dang good. So instead i traded it out for a picture of my loot, all treasures that i once owned but were craigslisted away when i was downsizing. As i look at the Kenny Rogers on a wooden plaque i almost tear up. I stole it from the bus barn back in 2002. It was just chilling on a table, and no one was around. Also someone had stole an outfit i left in the bathroom a few weeks earlier. So i felt a little vengeful and had an impression that Kenny was the universe's way at paying me back. So i took all the stuff out of my backpack and stuffed Kenny in. Sneaked out to the Honda Accord(88) and let Kenny free in the trunk.

This Kenny Rogers thing, along with all these treasures meant a lot to me. I think it was just a phase where i needed to be free of possessions (lame and very unAmerican of me) that caused me to part with this loot. If anyone ever finds a 'Kenny Rogers, riding a horse, wooden plaque thing', send him my way, I promise to not be so careless. At any rate, enjoy the header.

Thursday, December 6, 2007

The Rule of not ragging on people on my blog is about to be put on the back burner... ready?

I am DJ Jodeci... I Dj weddings. A good friend of mine asked me to dj his wedding. On a side note, at one point in time we went on a few dates. Didn't work out. Ended up reuniting at the YMCA party. Shared love stories, he gave me advice before and after Reno 911 didn't work out. Anyways, of course I said, "Yes I would love to DJ your wedding", he must have asked a few times before we finalized it. Anyways I said I would do the whole thing for 250 dollars, he talked me down to 200. For 4 hours of work, that is a smoking deal and I was doing it as a favor. Then, about 4 weeks later, I get a text. "We don't need you to DJ, found someone else". Whatever.

Tonight at institute, I was catching up with DJ Rome. He said, "Jo, i might be in Europe and i have a wedding you can do, Do you remember ________?" I guess I was not hiding my annoyance, cause Rome was like, "What's up? Why are you bitter?" I explained the senario. Rome was like I am charging him 300 and you can have it. The funny thing is that ____________ has ripped on Rome more than once. However, Rome is a much more experienced DJ than me. I just wish the whole thing was prefaced like, "Jodi, if Rome can do it, than we won't need you" or "if I can't find someone else could you do us a huge favor", not a verbal contract and than a spineless text.

OK, i know this isn't the worst thing that could have happened and I myself have been super flaky once or twice.... I guess my pride was a bit hurt and because of that i won't go to the reception, even as a guest. Oh well.... I got better places to be where the music of a slightly less experienced dj is appriciated ( i guess that might be my house only).

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Driving is so much better than not Driving -Van Goodman

Yesterday was a milestone. My little brother got his drivers license. Yesterday he was in the Altima, driving around the neighborhood with a silly grin on his face. He still can't drive a car to school, so i had to pick him up. It was a joyful ride, we saw a man with a fuex-hawk in running gear by the canal, who was all soft looking but trying to look bad ass, and I said, "Yuckers"..... he laughed, which is so great, cause i forget that I am hilarious. Then he broke the silence a minute later by saying, "Driving is so much better than not driving". I continued the theme by saying, "Making out, is sooo much better than not making out". We went a little crazy with this theme. "Having money, is so much better than being broke"."Being smart is so much better than being stupid" , "Having a straight finger is so much better than a broken one" and my favorite, "Eating good food is so much better than being Rawsome".

Sunday, December 2, 2007

Hippie Bus, American Traveler, Kayaking Every River in North America and doing Missionary work Dream

Everybody got a dream... mine was always, always, always to be as free as a bird. I thought the rainbow hippie bus was the greatest symbol, for that freedom. One that you could live out of, and travel the world in, and maybe discover the secrets of the universe in (what can I say I am an idealist).

Well, like most dreams, they are either forgotten, buried or pushed aside because "real life" just doesn't seem to have room for the dream. When ever I see a VW bus, or even a school bus that has been decorated, I wonder, "ARe those people happier than me, are they having more fun than me, with their life in the bus"... yes, yes they are.

I have been struggling with loving my job, my city and my circumstances. Yet, because I am a grown up, with a mortgage and a car payment, and a teaching contract and student loans, and a need to stay in the mecca where is an ample supply of mormon men, I just can't seem to live my "free as a bird in the rainbow colored bus" dream. I am usually alright with that, I get it, and obviously there is the side of me that wants and needs my comfort zone.

I guess, I just wish there wasn't such a battle between my ideals and my real life. Did that sound whiny. Sorry. I guess I am getting into the "NEW YEARS ANNALYZE YOUR LIFE MODE" early.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Our MTC boyfriends....

All of a sudden all of these women in their late twenties are going on missions. Maybe they see what is lacking in the single scene and just don't want to deal with it for 18 months. Maybe they are just thinking, it's not too late, "Maybe i didn't miss the mission boat". In the last week, two woman who I never in a million years would suspect a desire for full-time service from, have decided to go. So good for them right? I definitely think the mission could be better with a more mature outlook, or maybe not. I don't know if you returnees are like me, reliving my mission life, especially my MTC time, is just not something I do on a regular basis. Tonight was different...

In the MTC, i met an amazing cast of people. My district, my branch, my comp...yeah,yeah yeah. Also I already had a few connections. My brother was already there. One of my best friends of all time, Nathan Coffee entered the same day that I did (which was sooooo awesome). My best fhe brother, who was as cute as a button, was there. My cousin Gary, who was a cowboy was there. All these little local Rexburg boys from summer school were there. All my brother's friends were there. Yet the most unexpected meetings were with my MTC boyfriends, Clearly defined as the men i met in the MTC, who under other circumstances i would have been attracted to, but because I locked my heart I could only be friends with them, and maybe we would hint at becoming an eternal family later on (come on I was 21).

Kasper is one of my favorite people. Well known as Hermana Kasper back in 1999. We spoke on the phone today and relived the best 8 weeks of our lives, the MTC. Kasper's MTC boyfriend was hot. Vance. She says, "we would not hold hands, but we would give extra long high fives... (essential physical contact, when physical contact was not allowed). She also says, he might swat or pat my hair, only for a second...just playfully when no one was looking (intense).

My MTC boyfriends were not so clued into the subtle physical contact of MTC relationships, and honestly, I don't think I was ready for that level of commitment (that the extra long high five entailed). We spoke more in terms of planning for the future, when we would be seeing each other after the mission. Yet we too had our ways of developing relationships of trust... our secret meeting spots. 'Meet me in "Country Home"(the name I lovingly gave to the middle cafeteria)by the popcicle cooler before the fireside", or "what time are you guys going to do a session, let's walk there together" (oh we were sneaky and intense). My favorite was th exchanging of the address. These men were going to write me every week, seeing me through the 18 months, then when they returned 6 months after me, we would reunite...we promised.

I gotta admit, I loved the wholesomeness of flirting in the mtc. I loved the fact that if you didn't have someone special to write you before you left, (or you were just greedy and wanted more letters/attention/spiritual motivation) the MTC was a last shot chance, to make that happen. Plus the guy girl ratio was awesome...go figure. Another bonus was at 185 pounds (I went in at a hefty 165 and gained 20 from country home's goodnes) I was still making spiritual connections and intense eye contact, you know I loved it. MTC boyfriends (you probably have 4 kids now and have no idea who i am) I will always miss seeing you at choir, maybe sitting next to you in the cafeteria, lingering by the scripture section in the bookstore together and the moments we cherished in the call center.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007


My dog is named Heru. It means "the great white ninja". It is from a Chris Farley movie.

Today I heard about a family in the MEsa School district. The kid's names are King Tut(boy), Playboybunny (girl) and Pimp (boy)

My best friend and cousin, just named her daughter Annie. I think that is the best name, and if I ever get out of dodge I might just give myself that as my new name. Well it would be sort of be a part of the name i have now, "Jodiane".

I refuse to give my (future) daughters slutty cheer leader names. To all those, Tiffany, Chastitiy, Charity, Monica, Hillary, Brittney, or Monique's...sorry I just can't do it. My girls are getting all motions, (sparkle, twinkle, lazer, and jazzy... just kidding)

My cabbage patch doll was named Roni. I hated that name. I sort of think it is the worst name for a cabbage patch ever. My mom made me a fake, softer, cabbage patch. I named her Cuddles. NO JOKE.

My first dog was named Bell. My dad named her. Yet, when she had puppies, I chose the all black one, and named him Torpedo. Out of all the pet's I have ever had. I wonder and miss Torpedo the most.

My car has two distinct names. Ellie, or Elliot... my car is an Element. In college my car was named Grey Hawk. It was a stick shift Cadilac. I never made out in that car... I always really wanted to.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Single and Ready to Mingle...Three th0ughts from today.

1. Remember when people used to say that for reals? I don't really remember the exact place where i heard that little lymric, yet i think it has to do with 80's movies. Linger Longeer or Mingles is what happens after the three hour block. There is some random dish that is rarely that good, and you get to sit there and have awkard conversation with men that are 21... which would be good in some circumstances... but it just isn't at mingles. I guess it is sort of like Ward Prayer up at Ricks, just one more opportunity to make it happen, before the FHE that is 24 hours later. Hmmmm,

2. Did I tell you all my visiting teacher asked, "so they are still going to let you stay in the ward, even though you are 30".... what kind of question is that (ok maybe legit, but no one asks it, well I probably would have if I had to visit an oldie when I was 12).

3. Today I went back to Brimhall on my prep. to meet with another teacher. I got caught in the hallway during passing periods. All my students had such different reactions. Some wanted hugs, others ignored me and looked the other way. The high-five was resurected. Most wondered, how Iceland was, or if I was loving life in Canada. I got sick of correcting them so I was like. "Iceland changed my Life" or "I am going back to Alberta to marry my fiance", they loved it.... everyone wants a 7th grade teacher that got out of dodge and is making life happen. Maybe I ought to live up to the facade. Anyways, sweet Elide said, "miss goodman, i need to add you to my myspace, will you let me"... oh i love Jr. High.

Monday, November 26, 2007

Off the Wagon.... but not off the wagon trail?

Van turned 16. Texas Road house. Sunday Luke and Dad endulge in the last of the leftovers. Jodi stands alone in rawsome land. Only veggie shake, and raw trail mix for the day's sustenance. Not strong enough to resist baby cow (aka hamburger). Date tomorrow with kid from Seattle. He wants wings. I said, OK. Regretting my weak moment. At least now i can eat a Banzi Burger... and get off the depression train.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

ARRRR. Rawesome Update.

Remembering thick, fatty gravy...makes it just 1 percent easier (not really)

I am riding the Depression Train... I can't have comfort food, and it is killing me. Maybe i am a baby, and I have to just buck up and think about all the benefits this will bring. But I can't stop thinking about RED ROBIN BANZI BURGER and Bottomless fries. Man alive, comfort food I miss you already and it has only been 50 hours. All I can do is go out to the Tangerine tree... but I have eaten 18 tangerines today. I don't know if that is good. ABout 2 hours ago I decided I wanted a salad, but we all know a good salad needs dressing. So as top-chef as my guide (sort of) I became a chef genius. I put honey, fresh squeezed lime juice, red ongion, olive oil and poppy seeds in the blender and whoop, zoop, sloop... I got myself some dressing. All I have to say about that is, tanginess not at it's finest hour. I miss you ranch and honeymustard, and blue cheese. Our time away will be hard on me, but I will grow stronger, and I will never forget you.

LIFE.....being born again.

Being Born AGain...I always really loved that idea. A new start, a clean slate, somehow becoming reborn. It seems impossible doesn't it? All the baggage I keep carrying around seems to make demolition and than reconstruction impossible, yet, all the more appealing. As U2 says it so well, "all that you can't leave behind". However, there are people who do change, who do start again, who make something out of nothing.

Hmmm, last night i was out with an ex of mine. And he is all in the reinventing, rebuilding, finding himself mode (I guess that is what a divorce will do to you). To him it is about becoming all those things he gave up for her, all the things he used to talk about with me. He wants to live in an air-stream trailer (he just bought it). He wants to live his life according to his own voice. There is something amazing about reinventing... because we can, because it is not too late. I guess I have always been drawn to those who are not content. There is something beautiful in the searching, the craving, the wanting more, the bucking the system or just living differently. I guess it is because contentment has forever eluded me. Perhaps I believe it is only with a new start that I might find it.

Yet, then the internal struggle rages. We are grown ups, we need to be stable, responsible, just go with the flow. We should count our blessings, and just accept that things are this way. Yet, I believe we are of the mindset that mixing it up, living life like an experiment, having theories and testing them, makes it all the more interesting. I love the idea, "Anything can happen",even a new slate, a pure heart, something beautiful out of a mess, or a chance to be born again.

Maybe, I will find contentment through change. Maybe evolving is the only way to truly be happy. Maybe.... we were meant to become more.

RAWSOME UPDATE: I am still going strong, It has been about 40 hours and I am 100 percent. This mornings shake had spinach, prunes, 1 cup of flax seed, sun dried tomatoes and cool water. In other words, it was powerful.

RAWSOME QUOTE OF THE DAY: "I think a rawsome diet makes the mind think clearer, and the vitals and bowels more active"-Jodi Goodman

Thursday, November 22, 2007

"If I were Beowolf... I would just chill with Angelina Jolie and make our own supreme race of Golden Dragons"


Thanksgiving. A day when i truly am grateful for Pilgrims and Indians, and the gospel, and great food, and family. What a good day. It came it went so quickly. And now I look foreward. I took pictures of the Turkey carcass as I begin my new adventure of Rawsomeness. Thats right folks, no matter how many sweet young men i meet on lds linkup want to take me to Native New Yorker for cheap wings on Tuesdays, I gotta look at my pictures of Turkey carcass, and say, "can we go to your house and watch a movie instead?" I mean, I take my rawsomeness seriously (granted this is probably the 38th serious attempt) but I am super serious this time. Plus I got my brother Luke, in on the deal. So, let the biggest looser, turkey bones and the fact that like a testimony... the belief needs to be strengthened by actions. I have believed in Raw food only for quite some time, I just can't pull off the practicing the diet, day by day bit. I just wanted a little accountability (hence the blogging manifesto).

PS... be grateful for your significant other, Holidays are especially rough for the single gal, so i gotta make up weird diets to make life interesting (but we all do what we gotta do to make our "dream body" dreams come true when those Mormon dreams seem to be extra slow).

PPS If you think my diet is bunk... than remember what the wise Ben Harper says, "What is of the earth is of the greatest worth". I think he was talking about wheat grass, and spinach or something. This is my new motto, "What is of the earth is of the greatest worth, you can steal it from me, cause really I stole it from Ben."

Monday, November 19, 2007

Memo: To all girls in the single scene who write a blog about their hometeacher, that expresses feelings that once might have been, but now not really

Don't do it, you might have a great visit with him and his companion, and come clean about your blog (just because I always come clean about everything), and then see that person at church about an hour later, and sort of feel awkward because you called him sort of sexy "in a mountain man sort of way" and you said his name was stupid (but just to be sort of funny, you didn't mean it) and now you wonder, "Can our fantastic hometeacher/hometeachee relationship continue unscathed"?

Then you remember back when Ken C. was "persistently persuing" Amy and she wasn't really into it, but I wrote a funny blog on mugrunners about the senario (because Amy and I had never kissed the same guy and if it was Ken, than that would be a first)and then Ken C. googles his name and finds it on the site (yeah, yeah i know you can't use first and last names but what a lame-o to google your own name) and then demands that Amy has it removed, then Amy calls me and says the "shit has hit the fan all because of me" and hangs up... and I know I haven't messed anything up for anyone in awhile so I don't know what that means, and then at some point Ken C. says I am bordering on defemamation, and just lack plain common sense. So blogging and men never work out.... wait jodi and men never work out.... but Jodi and Blogging, now that is a match.

Sunday, November 18, 2007

I've been tagged....What?

I guess I have been, tagged and I don't know what that means. I think it means you make up questions and then answer them yourself. Alright.

1. What is your favorite word? Rawsome

2. What kind of man are you trying to avoid? One who tells me what he thinks I want to hear (thanks Mitch for the insight).

3. Biggest Regret? I know I am supposed to say I have no regrets... Too many things to mention. However, leaving my mission because of the parasites is probably number one.

4. What is your mormon dream? Learn to have more faith, and be able to show more Christian love and service.

5. What I am giving up for lent? I am giving up all cooked food for 6 months after Thanksgiving (Sumo just bet me 100 bucks I can't make it a week).

6. Best song to play at a wedding.... Bryan Adams "When you love someone", when the intro hits, I am ready to look for love.

7. Do you like animals? I hate all cats, except "Panther", the black and white colored cat that all my little cousins call Panther.

8. Love or Lust? Yeah.

9. Favorite sibling? Van or Rita, or Jimmy or Willy or Luke...Sumo or Tamera, I love em all. They are fantastic.

Friday, November 16, 2007


Today i googled "teacher ethics". There was a lot to be said. I wanted to make sure I was truly being ethical in the classroom. I think with eighth graders, just not killing them sort of makes you an ethical being. The site said, if you become a better human being, you will become a better teacher. Also, that negativity will make a much bigger impression on the youth, that would it on adults. I learned that I should not be presenting or discussing social issues that are radical. Anyways, I just think that is interesting, because for their reports they had to choose a social issue. The principal wanted nothing to be "radical". I obviously set some parameters to stay in the boundaries, yet left a lot open for them to choose from. It is pretty awesome to see 30 computers all displaying different social issues, and kids to be learning something new about their world. Today one of my students stumbled across some footage of cows and chickens being raised and then slaughtered. We got into a short, private discussion where he said, "it is wrong that there is so much other food for people to eat, yet we can't stop eating meat, and these animals are dying just so we can enjoy a hamburger". Hmmm, couldn't have said it better myself. I guess that is what everyone says after the cow/chicken slaughter movie. Yet, I hope that their minds will hold onto the feeling of discovering something new. Maybe there minds will change a bit, maybe... I can still be an idealist about teaching like I used to be. Maybe.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Memo: to all those who let the love of your life (who didn't love you back) talk in great detail, about their new love with you

Don't do it, it is cruel and unusual punishment. You are thinking "hey they will see how wise i am with my great advice and listening ear....and love me again". They are thinking, "if i talk to this person about my new love enough they will get the hint and move on... plus I get to have my ego stroked and some great advice from a person who cares about me (sweet)". Don't even talk to the ex. BLAR, especially about their new loves BLAR BLAR. Let's bring self respect and dignity back!!! We can do it.

The Graveyard...cause everyone got a dream that died.

Oh Thursday Night... the usual staples are in full effect. A drive home from work, a stop at Oasis East (my dad's new insurance company) and a little mental prep. for the institute. And when I arrive (not to class mind you, but to the social part after) the prep. has been well worth it.

I park the Element in it's usual location. I let the techno song play out it's finale. I put on some lip moisturizer (one's thirty year old lips, need to look sufficiently moisturized, at this the most important social event of the week). I take a second look at my bright yellow rose earings, (I will later decide to put them in my pocket but at this moment they are a go).

I walk slowly and confidently towards the chapel, I have nothing to fear, this is my commune, these are my people. The thick aroma of canned corn overwhelms my nostrils, canned corn and something else.....wait, YES! Funeral potato's . Class is not out yet so the line is short. I quickly load my plate with 3 different varieties of Funeral Potato's, deliberately passing by the ham and corn.

Finding my way to the stage, it takes two tries to hoist my booty up. Finally I make it. Now I am comfortable, and am in prime position for all that "needs to happen". I am in full view of 3 of the 4 entrances. I can definitely see what is going on at the other side of the room. Others can see me. However, I am in a power position, where snap judgements can be made. These skills make me more efficient, and at the tute, time management is a plus. Also, if I was into anyone, I could definitely stalk them, (but i'm not).

Why am I so good at this you might ask. Is my knowledge and prowless at the tute, only a facade? Nay my friends, the secret is two fold. Part 1 is Habit. Steven Covey talks about developing it and sharpening the saw. Well my post-institute socializing saw is way sharp. Part 2... Survival of the Fittest. It is a law in nature. If I wasn't soooo good at what I do at institute, I could not have lasted sooo long.

Wait...maybe i am too effective, too comfortable, and too set in my ways. Maybe next time I will mix it up, I am going to hang out by the water and punch bowls. My life just keeps getting more exciting...I'll let you know how the punch bowl strategy fares.

Monday, November 12, 2007

His name is Kurt.... (The last 4 days)

1. I know his name, yet it doesn't matter. The mystery is gone and I am not into him anymore, i think it was just the hometeacherly glow that i was loving.

2. We are doing research reports and i told the kids i would write one too (stupid Miss Goodman) and my thesis statement is "Humans do not need to drink cows milk, in fact cows milk can contribute to health problems in humans. I don't want to write that, googling it and reading is one thing, but siting sources and making a logical point is something quite more strenuous(GRRRRR). Why do I promise things that sound good and then regret them?

3. The First Annual Rita and Harry Goodman reunion (aka we all live within 1 mile of each other, lets get together and eat) went well, lot's of pictures, babies and food.

4. I stayed for all 3 hours of church...ever since AK started the weight loss challenge, we don't go eat at her dad's sub shop (closed on Sunday but we got the key).

5. Jen had a pazzooki party on Sunday night. The east Valley's finest were all there. I had awkward conversation with strange people. I felt myself beginning to compare myself to the other women there. I noticed my jeans were not as tight as there's (no judgement, just what i noticed). I sat on the love sack with Joe, we had pleasant conversation. He spoke of a woman he loved, who over conversation, revealed the qualities she is looking for in a mate, he said, to her, "i encompass those attributes on your list"... hmmm, didn't i have this conversation is HS, and have been having it with the discarded since those days... Yes, yes I have. The unchosen, need answers, or at least a listening ear of some girl, they used to go to singles ward with 5 years ago, who has no interest in them or their lame story.... (yes, i am that girl).

6. Downloaded a song I heard on my XM radio by a group called The Knife...I think that song is everything I am about (80's punk). The live version is on my myspace (but you can't check it unless your my friend, because my profile is private, because I am a teacher, and I can't have the kids knowing that I am a real person). But the song is called Heartbeats. LOVE IT!

7. Watched way too many reruns of Project Runway...It premiers on Wednesday.

8. Had some pretty cool moments with my brothers, especially Van. My mom was making Homeade root beer for the reunion. She probably put 5x as much yeast as she needed. So when she made us try it, Oscar winning performances ensued. I have never used or heard the word, "yeasty" used so many times (that's a blessing in itself). Anyways, during this time, Van (he is 15 )decided to go into the pantry and get out some A&W, just to make the point that mom's root beer was not good. Also in a prayer later at the reunion I saw his eyes were open, I flashed him a gang sign, and the kid lit up. Very cool.

9. In Laws (especially my special lover to be, where ere you are) beware, when the extended Goodman Family sings...OH DOGGIES. Sumo and Tamara (my inlaws) had yet to experience the flat notes, the tone defness, the fact that some will start loud and end up soft or the other way around, or just the overall horror of when the Goodmans all sing in harmony(i do not use the word literally).

10. My favorite people are coming. Remember when meeting your spouse on the mission was something people frowned upon(i don't know, i guess as a general rule it still holds). Yet, there are those special cases when two amazing people meet that way(let's be honest meeting your love is a miracle no matter where it happens)and it is fantastic. Well, my two favorite missionaries I served with have been married for over 7 years, they live in Prescott and will be here to do a temple session on Saturday. Just hearing Hermanna Kellen's voice today, made me sooo happy. I love that a boy from Panama and a girl from Juno Alaska can meet in El Salvador, CA... and 9 years later have an awesome family of five.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Murmuring a confession. I am so Lemuel.

So i have been sort of in a selfish funk for quite some time. I seem to only be clued into what other's gots and what i don't gots. Hmmmm, maybe the funk has been a lifelong roller coaster of total contentment and whiny "why me/why not me's". So i decided to regain some focus with my life, and what a better way to start then with a little beginning of the BOM. Sure enough the first chapters always make you wonder, could i leave my gold and precious things (aka my element, makeup, bed, laptop and clothes) and head out to the wilderness(any day, thanks to my Anasazi training, I can live off the land). But the other thing that caught my attention in my recent readings was Laman and Lemuel's murmuring. For most of my prior readings, I felt distant and apart from them, yet feels like we are of the same mentality. I forgot that murmuring is not only unbecoming and unattractive, it also keeps one far from the spirit. I guess it has been awhile since I have remembered we need to endure each season with dignity, maturity and faith. Thank goodness, we have the Word, to keep us in check.

Friday, November 9, 2007

What's in a name?

I have been in love with two Reed/Reid's. Have made out with 3 Matt's, Somehow can't make it happen with men named Steve (4 have come and gone) and there have only been one Reggie, one Reuban, and one Cardon. Now, names do they really matter?

I had been sort of eying my home teacher. Nothing serious mind you. I just think he is interesting. His little heart was smashed about the same time mine was. He laughs at my jokes and is rather attractive, in a mountain man sort of way. So I asked if he was social, he said, "not so much, but is ready to try", and I said, "is it ok if I invite you to Halloween festivities". He said, "maybe". So i called him once to invite him (he didn't go). I called him again after he mistakenly texted me, "cute girl, must get it from her mother" (do you think he is into a single mom, or a mom is fixing him up, i am not sure) raz him about the mis texting. And I called him to see why he wasn't at church(lame, i already know). Now, when I call he wants to talk, I try to get off the phone and he won't let me, he is a great conversationalist and thinks the same of me (unless he is just magnifying his calling, maybe).

So my best friend AK knows all this, and I was asking, "what does this mean?" She said, "it means, he thinks your cool, but he doesn't want to be your boyfriend".... Then she said, "whats his name anyway, all you call him is hometeacher?" I said, "ummm, Curt, or, maybe Kirk? She was like "you have been calling this person, and having long conversations, and you don't know his name", I was like... Curt or Kirk are names you can say like, "Kurtk and no one knows the difference. And I think Kirk/Curt are the stupidest names ever anyways....wait, my first H.S date/love who I was too scared to kiss was named Curt. Nah, still stupid.

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Yep. My Day (not my best blog. Sorry)

1. Today one of my students said, "Miss Goodman how ols you"? I shot her a question right back, "How old do you think I am?" She said, "27" I said, "OK i'm 30, why?" She didn't miss a beat when she said, "cause you like a 5 year old in a 30 year old body!"

2. Remember that song from the late 90's, that said, "What if God were one of us, just a slob like one of us" and the lady on the music video had curly hair and a nose ring. Yeah, I knew you remembered. Well today as I was typing up a packet for our research project, one of my students began singing that in a Chinese Women's voice. Hmmm, very strange.

3. In our classroom when you act up, you can either go to "Take a Break" or "Serenity Now". Lot's of the kids like to sit there, not when they are in trouble, but because it is just in the back (far a way from my watchful eye). Today, one of my favorite little trouble makers said, "Miss Goodman, can I sit in Serenity Now?" I said, "NO, but you can sit up here in the front and ring my bell if the class acts up". He was so psyced about his job. And was well behaved all day. He didn't ring the bell, until the class was all crazy. Then he rang it with such authority at the perfect time..... it made a teacher proud.

Monday, November 5, 2007


Today started out as an ordinary day. I got to school, made some copies, finished my veggie shake (that hardcore) and checked my social sites, all is well. Then in the afternoon, after all students had left, I began to check my sites again. DARN IT! I was denied access to my own blog site, and my second favorite site, LDS LInkup (a mormon myspace)was not accessible either. I always check my friends' blogs via my site, and then i mosey on over to see if figter4U my Pakistan Love has left me a message. Usually I can check my business during lunch, before or after school, and maybe if the kids are working... i would do a little site checking. Yet today it didn't work out that way. First I tried to access my blog... Denied. Then i quickly jumped to the LDS LInkup... Denied. I checked again, Denied otra vez. Anyways, I think it is a conspiracy that is keeping me from my loves,(sort of how a woman with a black tooth, once kept me from my love, long story). Anyways, I think I felt some foreshadowing (yep, I teach jr. high English, and use words like that for reals) of this day happening. For about a week, I felt like the computer was tracking my every move, to see where I was spending my time. Then, my computer "broke" at school. So I was using one of the student computers to do my online socializing. I think it was "their" way of removing the tracker, so "they" could use the information to destroy my at school social activities. However, I am not derailed by this. In fact, it was probably a good thing because I was getting addicted to figter4U and his sexy broken English.

Sunday, November 4, 2007


My first love, (the one I count as the first of the three, the three big, heartache inducing, crazy pain loves, the men I thought I would marry for sure, but didn't) was the reason I stopped using the phrase soul mates. Up to that point in time, I used those words frequently. Hmmm, when I was younger I dreamed of that one, "meant to be with me person". I listened to all the cliches with hope and belief, "when you meet the right one, you know it", or "It will just feel different when you meet the right one". Now after I thought both those love cliches and many others were what was happening to me (back in 2001) after finding the most original, inspiring, one of a kind man, the one I thought heaven made for me.... and it didn't work out, I was done using the term soul mates, done.

Yesterday I was at an awesome wedding reception. My friend Erica and her husband had eloped a few months before, and were now just doing a low-key, tropical themed affair. It was awesome. I saw many friends I hadn't seen forever. The real surprise was meeting my friend Gina's "Soon to be Husband". They had met online (both over 30) and as I asked for the details...all those cliche's I mentioned above were spewing out of them. For example, "it's just so easy, no drama" and "IT's a miracle, it just feels meant to be".

About 30 minutes before they arrived, I was introduced to 3 guests of the wedding who were from out of town. My friend Jen quickly whispered...."that one of the girls dated Gina's fiance, for over 2 years and doesn't understand, what Gina has, that she doesn't have "(The Question, you will never, ever, not in a million years get an honest answer to). Jen continued, "She is a little bitter that in 3 months he could commit to Gina, and after 2 years he couldn't commit to her".

Love Bites. I often wonder if it is random, and we are all just at it's mercy with no rhyme or reason. All people just out there doing the best we can, trying to find someone we like who likes us back. Or is there is some grand, soul mate-type of design, which necessitates a person will find only their match, no matter what...cause destiny wills it. I don't know. However, I do know when there is someone you want, and they don't feel the same, neither scenario makes you feel better.

W,hich "love design" do you believe in soulmates or free choice? And has your belief ever changed, like mine did because of 2001.

Saturday, November 3, 2007

Hardcore II

Today I did it, i ran my first Triathalon in Casa Grande. It was sort of funny because I have just started to learn to swim. It was not pretty. The best part was running into all my old pals. It is awesome to see so many randomites putting their bodies to the test. The Race was a 400m swim, a 10 mile bike and a 3 mile run. I did not check to see how I did yet, I sort of don't want to know. I have sooooo much improving to do, and that to me is very, very exciting. Anyways, I challenge everyone to get out there and move it. It is just fun to feel a sense of accomplishment, and the community spirit. OK The HIGHLIGHTS

1. I definately was a bit body conscious of just rocking my one piece for about the first 4 minutes, then you realize, hey my body ain't the best, but there were a lot more nasty things out there, I'm alright.

2. Transitioning is fun, when you are a novice...and just sort of McGyver your outfit. After the swim, i scooted to the transition area. My plan was to put a sports bra over my swimsuit, and then put some shorts and shoes on...I must say I transition faster than others, I definitely will be purchasing better attire for the next race, and will practice my transitions.

3. The bike was awesome. It was a friend, of a friends. It always amazes me that people out there are so cool, nice and giving. The world is definitely full of great people, i road strong and fast.... for me.

4. After you get off your bike, and you start running your legs feel like cement. It is a sensation I have never experienced before. It was only a 3 mile run, but because it was my first tri, my body wasn't used to the variety of actions, it had to preform. I was good for the run, until about the last half mile. I had swallowed soooo much water in the pool, and it began to cause a cramp in my rib area (very strange). Anyways, my friend Brendan was there to help encourage me, also I raced another friend in. Very Cool. I finished. I feel Born Again.

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Hard Coreness....the legend of the veggie shake.

Hard Core is what Amy, Mitch and I say we are when we are on something i like to call, "should be on diets, but love food too much to be on a diet for reals". This usually happens in the summer time....when our little chubbers spill over the sides of our last chance swim suits. We will sit at the pool.... drinking bevrages and decide where we want to go for lunch and then later dinner. Usually the restaraunt we choose, would not ever lead one to believe that we were necessarily hard core. I used to use the word "hardcore" to describe myself to my ex boyfriend. I would say, "Baby, I am so hard core... ", as I was eating some chicken wings and philly cheese steak with yummy ranch and french fries and honey mustard, and onion rings....oh it is all so damn good. Needless to say, my hard core ness isn't exactly a way of life, maybe just a state of mind, or something i think sounds good to say.

When I was in El Salvador, my mom was diagnosed with cancer. She did all the things the doctors told her to do, and completed all their treatments. However, my dad wasn't satisfied with that. He researched and found a lot of information about the power of wheat grass and the veggie shake. A whole new way of eating, took hold. My family, at least my parents had gone green. Out in the garden, my Dad would grow grasses, all sorts of leafy goodnessess and even a weird hybrid of a melon and squash came into fruitation. Through Mom's new healthy lifestyle, and faith, she luckily achieved a full recovery. Yet, Dad was convinced the battle was not over, now prevention was the key.

After getting home, I was in awe of my parents new way of living (My Dad had been a farmer,so I grew up on whole milk straight from the cow and the remains of my pet pigs) i adopted their way of eating. How could I not, I had come home sickly skinny from parasite infections, and needed some nutrients to help get me healthy again. I adopted the "green" way of life, not with out it's quirks. Many a wheat grass shot has been vomited along the banks of the canal where I run. Many a man has questioned why one would drink veggies from a blender, when they could just make a salad. Many a student has asked, "what is wrong with you miss goodman, why do you drink the baby poop looking drink?" I just answer, I am THAT hardcore".

The great battle between good and evil is fought on many fronts, and I feel like it is fought in my stomache. This morning, I drank a carrot, spinach, aloe vera leaf, flax seed, apple, celery drink. For lunch i had raw cashews, 2 oranges and 5 mini candy bars (I told the kids they could eat candy today, only if they gave me treats, IT WORKED)...Then for dinner, I rocked greesy crab puffs from Kwans and 3 mini bags of M&M's and 2 mini TWIX.... I don't know why every day I start out on the righteous side of hardcoreness and then am seduced by the rich worldly treasures of the dark (chocolate) side? Who will win the battle? All I am sure of is it wages on in all of us......

Very Funny....

Teachers do a wrap up activity after every class. I have sort of been slacking so we just did one in honors. We did a quiz, where i just asked them random questions. Here is the quiz and the random stuff that is sometimes said.

1. How do you turn the noun hot dog into a plural noun (not hot doggies)?
2. What was my gpa in highschool?
3. Name 5 synonyms for pretty.
4. How far is a marathon?
5. What is a simple predicate?
6. "There are farm animals on the back poster, name the six kinds of animals, but don't turn around". I kept saying don't turn around, don't turn around, when a kid did, I blurted out, "YOUR EXCOM...". One of the Mormon kids, yelled out, "Ahh Miss Goodman you were gonna say, your excommunicated". We laughed. I totally was. I guess that idea that if you break the rules there are consequences came out loud and clear... The weird thing is that I dont' ever talk like that, I don't use the word excommunication in conversation, ever. Shoot.

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

From the Barrio

I had heard Sumo talk about their Halloween costumes. He was actually sort of sad that last year they didn't dress up like vatos. This pic is hillarious to me. Especially the faces of Rita and Sumo. I LOVE IT

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Teacher Cliches and the younger man....

I met a 25 year old from Seattle. He was soooo lame. He kept telling me about his ultimate goals to be a father and prepare to be a financial provider. This was with in 10 minutes of conversation. I love the mormon bait.... (tell me what you think I want to hear. BLAR!!!!)The worst part is he kept insisting that he was smarter than me because his plan was to become a nurse (and with an associates he could make 50,000 a year)and my plan to be a teacher wasn't financially savy (point taken). ARGGG. Then he kept saying how much he loved tall girls, because in junior high he realized that they were easier to dance with or something. Usually comments like make me feel good, (i think tall woman are sometimes not appriciated like they should be) but, he sucked so much, it just annoyed me. Then he mentioned that he had had 5 girlfriends in the last 3 years....(I did not care). He then said, "All the teachers I meet are boring, but you are not boring" (Shut up, shut up, shut up!!!!).Anyways, I refuse to talk about dating on this site, however...this was not dating, this was lame city.

Monday, October 29, 2007

Dirty Dancing.... a Ricks College Tradition.

It's not what you think. We didn't get all crazy at the club, nor did we get all crazy in the Manwaring Center. We just really liked to watch Dirty Dancing in college. I mean so much, that i think for 100 days straight, we watched it. Yeah, I didnt' really go to class back then, and my only other responsibilities were donating plasma and looking good in my fur coats (before the Veganism began). Anyways, somehow the movie Dirty Dancing brought us closer togeather. We didn't care that some of us were messier than others. We didn't care that some of us were breaking the honor code, for someone named Italian Stallion, we didn't care that we were from all walks of life and spiritual levels. All we cared about was Jonny and Baby and their love.

Sometimes, much like Kelly on the OFFICE will respond to the question, "what's new with you?" With a response of well, "Paris got out of Jail, Brad and Angelina had a new baby, and Suri is finally learning to walk....I am affected by others lives. Sometimes at dinner, one would pose the question, "exactly when did Johny fall in love with Baby?" We would discuss it passionately. Every woman with her own opinion. Now that question might be brought up later, when the movie was on, and we would pause the TV, looking for some indication of when Johny truly loved baby. We pinpointed it after much research. Strange as it sounds, I hunger for that exact look in the eyes of every lover. I know that when I get the look, the look he gave her after they did the merange at the other resort, but before they did the sexy dance in the cabin.... then I will know i have found true love.

Today, Dirty Dancing was on cable.... It all came back to me, as I quoted the lines, re-inacted the last dance of the season, and tried to pinpoint the exact moment when Johny loves Baby, I realized Dirty Dancing is timeless. Dirty Dancing is a classic. Dirty Dancing is the best movie of all time.

PS....Hungry Eyes and Overload are the best songs of time.
PPS....If you don't know why saying, "I carried a watermelon" is so devestating, this post did not touch your heart.

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Tonight We Dance Like We're In Love.

Saturday Night.... I did two things, I went to the Inter Stake Center(the average age was probably 22), where I felt old. Than, I went to Gary's house party (where the average age was 35) where I felt a little young. Isn't that funny, the environment one puts them self in, can effect how old they feel. No more....I am just loving 30 no matter what, where or who I am with. (As if I didn't secretly love it already)

Pic 1- Shane and I, he is by far the only reason I brought back back scratchers at church..... i was giving them up for classiness sake (but how could i resist the Tucson Boy)

Pic 2- I saw these guys rocking the short shorts at the interstake center. I must admit I felt a little weird when I took a picture of their aces.

Pic 3- These are my new friends, Brittney, Rob and Brady. We spent the weekend together and it is definitely great to be meeting fun people again.

Pic4- I love this guys costume. He was a crowd stopper, but i didn't understand why he kept putting "I lost my Dog" posters all over the party. Interesting...

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Sluts and Teen Wolf.....

I love Teen Wolf. The best movie of all time. When Michael J. Fox is going through those changes. And he is at the party with Boof and he goes in the closet for 7 minutes of heaven (never played that, always really wanted to). And he gets all wild, cause the wolf side is coming out. He is in a struggle between fighting the wolf side, and the good boy side.

Every Halloween we get gussied up. It is our chance to be what ever we want. There is always a party, a wild carnival, where the level of excitement and anticipation is higher then normal. The east valley offers a wide array or choices for Halloween festivities. Which one will I choose? I do not know, but this I do know. Girls will be dressed like whores.

Have I dressed like a whore in the past? Absolutely...but it was all in innocence. Now when I was 12, Grandma Goodman gave Karrie and I black, rabbit fur coats. They were short, so they ended at the waist. This coat was screaming to be worn on Halloween. And I knew just the theme. SLUTS. In my 12 year old mind, sluts wore rabbit fur coats and short skirts and dark lipstick. And at 12, I wanted to be that. I guess it is just the Mormon girl backlash or every girl backlash for that matter..... being a floozy is forbidden. So we embrace it on Halloween, we gotta let that wild side out. We are like Teen Wolf. We got a struggle going on, and at Halloween it is o.k to let the animal out. GRRRRRRR.

Looking back now, we trick or treated, at all those Mormon households.... looking like prostitutes. And when my mom said, "jodi, what are you dressed like?" I replied an 80's punk princess. And you know what, I have classed up the look a bit (no rabbit fur) yet, I still rock that 80's punk princess aka wild girl look in some form or another on Halloween. I guess I still gotta dabble in the forbidden. Even if it is in the safety of the Inter Stake Center, with my bishop as a chaperone, and making sure my outfit is modest, yet oh so seductive.....