The Fade.

yes, it has happened again. The "Fade".

you start going out with someone, it seems great, but then after a little bit of time, in my case 3 weeks, they start texting less, calling less, and all in all wanting to hang out less. I laugh because i am actually too busy to spend much time thinking and fixating and obsessing about it. And we both knew it wouldn't last since I am leaving in 2 weeks. But I always have to laugh at the fade. I don't think anyone knows how to say, "yeah, I'm done Peace out". I can't decide if it's because we as daters are spineless, or we just aren't too sure if we are done with the person, and the "fade" buys us some time and maybe even the option to reconsider later. For whatever reason, if I ever do get married, I am going to miss the stealthy, we-both-know-whats-going-on-but-aren't-going-to-acknowledge-that-we-know-it "fade out".

Don't ask me about the boy, it was very casual, he is 27 and loves motorcycles, and it was as always a great ego boost to get some attention from the younger man (not much has changed in all these years).

But all you readers out there, humor me and post in the comments either 1. your most hilarious/painful fade out (where you got dumped) or 2. the agony/awkwardness/relief of being the fader (dumping someone). I am just curious about everyone's experiences or memories with the "FADE".

on top of the world.

Lately I have been feeling cute and stylie. I have about 10 pairs of boots, some from Thrift, some from Last Chance and I also bought 3 pairs at the Macy's boot/shoe sale a few weeks ago. I rock leggings now, wear jewelry, put makeup on everyday, try to keep my grays covered and basically just look smoking hot everyday. But as I was about to completely indulge myself in vanity....I came across this beautiful picture again, and was quickly brought back to reality. YIKES.

Roomates.

I was living in downtown Mesa, in the historic district. My room was the basement. It was rad. I had a wood burning stove, that didn't actually work, but i decorated it with candles and plants. I had my home made hippie beads strung up in the doorway. I had a couch and my bed and a closet full of thrift store goodenss, it was the raddest room i had ever had, in the most perfect house. I would walk to the library, walk to Milanno's Music, ride my bike to Pete's Fish and Chips in other words, I was happy.

And then after 4 months of bliss it happened.

The normal roomates moved out, and the girl with all the unicorn/fantasy decorations moved in. There they were in the common area. A unicorn statute, multiple unicorn mirrors, a unicorn music box, some sort of magician poster, and many other decorations along these lines.

I was mortified, my perfect existence had turned into fantasy land. This women was in her mid-thirties. Here she was invading the common areas with all this maddness.

I immediately decided I would move out of this hell hole.

I like to think back on all the places I have lived, on all the people I have shared common areas with. As of late I have decided to be a lone wolf, and to live alone. I think I have earned it. I have learned what I needed to learn by sharing apartments, houses, etc. with the single Mormon Women of the West. I am done with the sharing.

I found a one-bedroom in Boise's Northend. So glad I won't be calling the institute, getting names of available housing, and going through the whole room mate thing again. I am a grownup. And I can't chance an infusion of unicorns...I just can't.

The men i meet online.

Here is something you need to know if you are single, or will be soon. Once you are in your 30's. Men think you are free game. All men. Sometimes a 21 year old will send me a "flirt" telling me something like, "wink" or "i'm interested". Sometimes a 74 year old with 5 kids and 19 grandkids will tell me "love at first sight" or "You're Hot!"(my confidence cup overflows)...and then men of all ages use the "I think your the one" if they are getting down to business or the "What's up" if they want you to know hey I'm casual, ain't no thang.

Lately I have met some interesting men on LDS Planet. I meet real ones (aka men in real time too). I mean, we all remember the kid in the Lucky Charms Scrubs who was into Rita and asked me if she was single because he saw her picture on my profile. But what you don't know is that one time a man in Tennessee who i felt bad for because he looked like a Hill Billy and was 68, and just seemed sad, and kept telling me "I'm not interested, but your profile says you like Bob Seager and I like Bob Seagar so lets be friends....". After a few one liners, he told me he could send me a money order, because he had money, and he just wanted us to talk on the phone, and he could pay if I couldn't pay. What??

Or how about the attractive 30 year old man who immediately thought i was his soulmate because he had been praying to heavenly father (God) for someone who understood him and I thought he was attractive so immediately i understood him. I tried to give him a chance, even though he was paying 55 percent of his income to the mothers of his children...but i am gonna have serious student debt when i get out of here, at best I need my future mans income to help pay off my debt, or at least not be paying for his 3 kids. Shoot. Is that wrong? In the end though, if someone is a stranger, and they aren't good on paper, walk away. No need falling for someone in Philly with a financial mess (he didn't even have a cell phone bc he couldn't afford it) when I got mens all over the place who are in financial messes. Just saying.

Then there was my favorite Ryan, he is still my facebook friend. He was 31, lives in Virginia I think, and we emailed back and forth for a few months. At one point i said, 'can we take this to the next level and maybe talk on the phone or ichat'. He said I was moving too fast.


Online loves... you might be out there, but you sure are tricky to discover. Shoot.

Home to AZ for Spring Break

I love being in AZ. The best people (and dog) are there. I had a great time. I can't wait to meet baby Sophie on my next trip.

HI EVERYONE

Just posting telling you all i have been pretty busy, and I want to post soon enough. Also i am sorry i haven't been commenting on your blogs too much either. Check back soon. I hopefully will be posting soon.

Daily Veggie Shake.

A normal day.

A veggie shake needed to be made.

Spinach base, radish sprouts, lentil sprouts, alphalpha sprouts, 4 stalks of celery, flax seed, chia seed, prunes, cranberries, apple, water, and carrots.

Usually i make this shake without sprouts

Brought two red cup fulls to school.

I guess they stunk....


What i heard from classmates.

1. "Jodi, that drink smells like a Fart, don't drink that, and get it away from me".
2. "Put a lid on that &%$@#".
3. "Jodi, we are all glad your getting skinnier, but that drink stinks".


I left the room, tried to force the rest down, gagged on it in the bathroom (these drinks need to be consumed slowly). I guess i will drinking veggie drinks at home.


XO

Low Self Esteem at the Great Clips...

So I am now Coupon Girl, i think it all started when my mom was a bargain shopper and would by clearanced clearance items. Then I got a bit of my own money and realized that I was definitely following in my moms footsteps...I loved the bargain too. I actually chose my law school based on price. And here in Moscow it has culminated, as I use a coupon for almost everything. So when the seasonal student coupon book comes out, i am one happy girl. Besides restaurants, there are a few other deals, on oil changes, tans and hair cuts.

So here I am showing up at the Great Clips, coupon in hand. Right now my hair is basically the simplest style to cut. I have bangs, all one length, and the rest of it is one length blunt cut. Thats why I don't feel bad getting a 7 dollar haircut...it's not that hard. Plus i am gonna tip a good 5 dollars, and it takes them 10 min. so i feel like it is a win/win for all involved.

That is until I say, "I want about an inch off the bottom, however, if it needs a little bit more so be it" and she says, "yeah, an inch will help a little, but there is damage and breakage all through your hair...You are gonna need to start repairing your hair to take care of all this damage" Who says that????

You see, at Great Clips, the cutters make 8 dollars an hour i think, but they get a commission off the products they sell you. So what better way to make me want to buy "Biolage Hair Strengthening Syrum" then by telling me how damaged and dry and broken my hair is. Honestly is a 7 dollar haircut worth that kind of abuse. I am not so sure. Right now my hair is the healthiest it has been in years....and I don't care what cut of the proceeds hair cutter gets, Please don't tell me how crappy my hair is...Blar.

Good Choices/Bad Choices.....lead to good result or bad result.

It was Thanksgiving break. I was flying home to AZ like I always do, whenever there is a break. On the first leg of the flight i sat by an interesting 15 year old, who i instantly liked. We talked about religion, misscariages (his mom had miscarried his sister when she was 6 months along) and saving sex for later (not marriage for him, he didn't want to get married, but just later) and not endulging in drugs or alcohol.

On the second leg of the flight from Portland to Phoenix, I sat my a man in his late 40's, who after a bit of pleasantries, I found out is a decision maker guru. In other words he goes around and teaches people (mostly high paid executives for corporations) how to make decisions, he basically gives one tools on how to make decisions.

We used the ever elusive decision of what type of law I want to practice, as the "example/proto-type" decision. He gave me many tools to use...which i am not going to talk about here. What I am going to talk about is the choice and the result connection. You see, my whole life I feel like I have been hitting a big brick wall. You see I was taught by my parents, by my church, basically by everything I ever believed in, if you make a good choice, you will get a good result (let's be honest I am talking about making my mormon dreams come true). However, he spoke of a concept that I had never had articulated either by someone else, or in my own mind. He said, "sometiems a good choice doesn't lead to a good result, and sometimes a bad choice will lead to a good result...but if you play the law of averages, the more good choices you make, the more good results you will reap, and the more bad choices you make, the more bad results you will reap.

Ok, so why am i talking about good and bad choices...well besides the obvious, that I am still trying to draw people to my life who will help me get to where I want to go. Recently, i applied to a Spring Break Exchange to South Korea. I jumped through all the hoops, wrote a little essay, sent in copies of my passport, had a professor write a letter of recomendation, etc. I was really excited for this program. I mean who doesn't want to go somewhere rad, for 10 days over spring break, for free. However, I just found out I didn't get accepted (i guess I am not the only one who wants to go somewhere rad, for 10 days, for free, over spring break). However, if I believe my traveleing companion...if i keep making good choices (applying for scholarship programs i think is a good choice), eventually I will get a good result, it's just the law of averages. So I guess, I am glad I made the choice to try to go on a little adventure, I guess i shouldn't count it as a total wash, becuase hopefully the next time I make a good choice...it will reap a good result. Oh yeah, and now I will probably go home for Spring Break, and thats gonna be good.

Rawsome Take 2

I was raw 100 percent for 15 whole days...which was amazing for me, the girl who couldn't even go 3 days after 1000 attempts. So here is attempt 1001, only this time i know what it takes to accomplish it. Alright I said it, lets see me do it again + more days.